Second Thoughts
by Impulsive-Rose
Summary: What if Suze managed to bring Jesse back from the dead but Jesse never expressed his feelings for her? And Paul stepped up and now Suze and him are getting married. Will Jesse finally get his chance to express his love for Suze? how will Suze take it?
1. Chapter 1: Intervention

**What if Jesse was alive but never told Susannah how much he loved her and remained a friend, nothing more. Would Suze marry Paul? Or would Jesse admit his feelings for her?**

Chapter one: Intervention

**Suze's POV**

I watched as the glistening waves lap gently against the sand as the morning breeze swept in. I sighed and went back to sleep, then with a jolt I sat back up, so suddenly, that the whole bed moved under my weight. I was getting married today. I was getting married to Paul Slater and in the next few hours I would be Susannah Slater, I toyed with the idea in my head, Susannah Slater hmm... not as good as Susannah De Silva. Whoa back up, did I just think that? What's the matter with me? Jesse De Silva is my best friend, we never... we could never... where just friends. I think I need some breakfast.

**Jesse's POV**

I watched as the glistening waves lap gently against the sand as the morning breeze swept in. I sighed and as I lent back in my chair. I couldn't get it out of my head, she is getting married today. Susannah – love of my life- is getting married to Paul Slater. She is to be Mrs Susannah Slater and there is nothing I can do about it. I had my chance and I blew it. Susannah De Silva sounded so much better to me. I groaned, I was killing myself slowly. This was going to be a long day.

**Suze's POV**

Maybe it wasn't such a good idea for Paul to ask Jesse to be his best man. Ever since I could remember they hated each other. Paul is jealous of Jesse, I don't know why but he hates us spending time together, I mean Jesse and I are friends. Jesse on the other had...well I have no idea why he hates Paul. I need to stop stressing, this is the day I have dreamed about ever since I was a little girl. Paul is...well Paul, I admit at the beginning he was arrogant and self-centered but thankfully he grew out of it. Plus I love the guy... at least I think I do... I let my mind wonder back to thoughts of Jesse. WAIT.. I have to snap out of this. I love Paul and I am going to be Mrs Susannah Slater by the end of the day.

**Jesse's POV**

Can I really do this? Can I stand up there as Paul's best man and pretend like every things alright? I don't know if I can stand there watching my Querida marry that... that... _hijo de a perra _(LOOK IT UP)_. _I guess I have to for Susannah's sake, could she ever for give me? Would she hate me if I admitted my feelings for her? I want to tell her I lov- my thoughts were rudely interrupted by the doorbell. With a heavy sigh I went to see who was so desperate to see me at 7:30 am. To my surprise Adam and CeeCee were at my doorstep – Adam's never out of bed this early so this must be important- "Hi guys come in" my voice was full of confusion, "what can I do for you?"

" Where going be quick" promised CeeCee.

" We're here because well... the thing is" stumbled Adam.

CeeCee cut to the chase "Jesse, we know you love Suze, everyone knows, except well... Suze, you can't let her marry Slater, hes not right for her, you are, we all know it and deep down Suze knows it".

WAIT... REWIND AND FREEZE! "um... I ..well" thats all I could manage to say.


	2. Chapter 2: Interruptions and toasts

**Some of you might of already read this chapter but I noticed there were a few mistakes so I fixed it up and I also found the PERFECT dress for Susannah at least I love it heres the link weddingdresses..au/photos/imageview.aspx?image7220&gallery2 **

**Thanks to all of you who reviewed! At the moment I have A LOT of free time so I'm going to be updating a lot so YAY! And even though I have hardly any reviews I am up dating already CAUSE I AM TOTALLY BORED!!**

**ALSO I have started to write another Fan Fic but it won't be up for a while. Its a little more lovey dovey !!**!

**Disclaimer: ok so you all know how it is, I don't own the Susannah or Jesse or Paul or any of the characters etc.**

**Chapter Two: Interruptions and Toasts **

**Jesse's POV**

Right now I'm standing outside Susannah's apartment trying to work up the courage to knock on the door. What have I gotten myself into? So much has happened since CeeCee and Adam's visit. I reassured CeeCee and Adam that Susannah would be happy with Paul – even though I wasn't convinced myself- I don't think they believed me. Jesucristo (more Spanish) are my feelings for her that obvious?

I have made up my mind, I have to tell her! I reached out to knock but the door was wrenched open and an angel almost collided into me. "Querida, you should watch were your going" it slipped out, I called her Querida but I couldn't help it she looks so cute when shes all embarrassed.

"Hi Jesse" she said with a smile that made me swoon. Damn it I need to get a grip.

"Susannah I -" I was about to pore out my heart to her when I was interrupted by a loud squeal, I looked over my shoulder.

**Suze's POV**

He called me Querida, he hadn't called me that since I met Paul – no idea what it means- I couldn't help but smile as I greeted him.

"Susannah I-" Jesse looked determined to tell me something but he was interrupted by a loud squeal. I turned around, Gina rushed towards me and smothered me with a hug. She had come all the way from New York to be my maid of honor. I glanced over Gina's shoulder at Jesse, he looked a bit crestfallen. He gave me a sheepish smile and without a word turned to leave. I was glad Gina was back but I was annoyed that she made Jesse leave, I could tell he wanted to tell me something important.

I sighed and thought about Jesse, I had been doing a lot of that lately. I've be so caught up in this wedding, I haven't had anytime for Jesse, ever since Paul, Jesse and I haven't had anytime to hang out like we used to. I miss that. I sighed again.

X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

**_getting ready_**

Gina and CeeCee are busy fussing over my hair "Suze are you alright, you look upset" CeeCee asked gently.

"Yeah Simon, you've hardly said a word" said Gina.

"I'm fine, I'm just thinking" I said with a tight smile "just thinking" I whispered.

**Jesse's POV**

You're doing this for Susannah, I reminded myself as I knocked on Paul's door. Paul appeared on the other side of the door. "Best man reporting for duty" I announced.

"Jesse, come in"invited Paul. Adam was already there

"How 'bout a beer to celebrate" suggested Adam. I could tell he was trying to keep the peace. Paul fetched three beers out of his expensive fridge.

"A toast to Paul" said Adam raising his bottle.

"I must be the luckiest guy in the world, that Suze is fine" smirked Paul. I wanted to hit him... hard. I noticed Adam glance in my direction but I ignored him as I tried to hide my anger by taking a sip from my beer. I looked at my watch,one more hour until Susannah marries Paul- el idiota- Slater on the Beach as the sun sets... how romantic... give me a bucket.

Suddenly I stood up " I got to go, I'll be right back" I said before I rushed out the door. Paul and Adam exchanged glances as I fled but I don't care if they think I'm crazy. I have to find Susannah and tell her how I feel, she needs to know.

**Susannah's POV**

I stood in front of a full length mirror admiring my reflection, ok I have to admit I looked pretty damn good. My hair was curled and left down, I choose not to have a veil but a few white flowers weaved into my hair. My make up looked perfect and my dress... looks amazing. I feel in love with it the moment I saw it. It's not one of those dresses with the big hoop skirts like they had in the 1850's, god no. It's not white exactly, its more of a cream colour, it's silky and long and... I love it so much!! . Ok it cost a fair bit but hey, it's my wedding day. CeeCee and Gina have disappeared I think they went to find a bottle of champagne.

I heard a noise behind me and turned around – as best I could in a dress made of silk- my heart skipped a beat.

" _Nombre de Dios" _he muttered.

**SO what do you think? It's a bit longer than my last chapter. I know it may seem like this story's going to end SOON but don't be fooled I have big Ideas for this story TRUST ME !! **

**READ AND REVIEW **

**I love REVIEWS !! **

**P.S. Notice how I wrote : **I looked at my watch,one more hour until Susannah marries Paul- el idiota- slater on the Beach as the sun sets how romantic... give me a bucket.

**Well you know how I called Paul; el idiota, that means the idiot BUT I wanted to say Paul the Jerk but I tried translating the jerk from English to Spanish which is el tirón but if you translate el tirón back into English it means; the pull ! THATS REALLY STUPID!!**


	3. Chapter 3: Amor or Love

**Amor or Love: Chapter Three**

HI guys! thanks for all your reviews :)

Sorry this chapter is really short but I didn't want to wreck the cliff hanger! The next chapter should be up soon either tomorrow or the 10th because I'm going away for the long weekend!

I was wondering if you guys could read and review my other FanFic entitled _**Our Hearts Are One**_ it hasn't been getting any reviews :( I wanna know what everyone thinks of it, good/bad Please Read and Review it BUT DON"T FORGET TO REVIEW THIS STORY EITHER !! OR ELSE :)

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters only the plot etc.**

**Jesse's POV**

"_**Nombre de Dios" I muttered under my breath. I couldn't take my eyes of her she looked so beautiful in her long silky gown... it was breath taking. I almost forgot the fact that she was going to marry Slater, I wanted to hold her in my arms..I wanted to... **_

I had to fight my urges, she... is ...marring...Slater (damn you Paul).

"Susannah" I was finally able to say "Susannah I ... I-" come on Jesse you can do it, just say it. "Susannah... I .. think you look beautiful". Damn it! I just couldn't tell her I love her.. I don't know why, maybe it's the way she was looking at me, so encouragingly! I watched as a blush crept up her face and filled it with colour, making her look more adorable then ever. I sighed and looked away.

"Jesse" She began slowly, taking a step towards me "is there something you want to tell me?" She was staring straight at me, right into my eyes, I couldn't tear my eyes away from hers "you know you can tell me anything" as she said this she grabbed my hand reassuringly, it sent shivers down my back. She had me cornered there was no escaping this. "Susannah I-" I began again and she smiled in an encouraging way "Susannah I love you" it had finally escaped my lips. I looked at her to see what her reaction was but it was expressionless, her face I mean, in fact she looked a bit confused. "Jesse" my heart skipped a beat, she didn't look mad, maybe there was still hope."Can you repeat that, I didn't catch a word of what you just said".

**Suze's POV**

It was kind of amusing really. Jesse I mean, the way he spoke so fast that I could barely catch a word of it and he looked so serious. "I love you Susannah" Jesse finally managed to say. "Aw, Jesse thats so sweet I love you to" I replied. It really was sweet of him, not many of my guy friends would admit they loved me, as a friends of course. I smiled at him but he didn't return it. In fact for some reason he looked a bit disappointed. "I don't think you understand" his voice was so full of emotion. I don't understand whats not to get ? "I don't understand" I told him solemnly. He looked down at our hands ( I was still holding onto his hand), then he looked up, I was lost in those rich brown eyes. It was as if they were searching, searching my soul.

Thats when it clicked. I finally understood. Jesse doesn't love me as a friend. He is in love with me.

**OK so that's it ! hope you liked it (even if it was short but I couldn't wreck the end could I) **

**hit the little purple button and review!! AND don't forget to Read and Review my other Fanfic: **_**Our Hearts Are One**_

**Love always Impulsive-Rose**


	4. Chapter 4: Closed Doors and Brick Walls

**Second Thoughts Chapter Four: Locked Doors and Brick Walls**

**Disclaimer:** Do I really need to explain? FOR ALL THOSE AIRHEADS OUT THERE I don't own any of the characters NOT even Jesse, If i did I wouldn't be writing this, I would be on a deserted Island having fun- if ya know what i mean ;) - with Jesse!!

**HI everyone !! Guess WHO'S BACK AND HAS WRITTEN ANOTHER CHAPTER?? I'll give you 3 guess... alrighty then, were did I leave you last... THATS RIGHT Jesse told Suze that he loves her and she thought he meant in a i love you as a friend way ... BUT he didn't and Suze FINALLY (notice the capitals) figured it out... Lets see what happens next...(**HAHAHA** i already know whats gonna happen nananana)**

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**Suze's POV**

"Jesse I...I-" I didn't know what to say.

"It's ok Querida".

"Jesse don't-"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, I just wanted you to know the truth, I'm sorry". I looked at him, into those eyes and I could tell he meant it.

Maybe thats why I did what I did. I dropped his hand -the one I had been holding- as if it was on fire and backed away. "I can't do this" were my parting words as I fled to my room, locked the door and tried not to burst into tears. I could her footsteps approach my door "Susannah, I didn't want you to be hurt because of this" his voice come from the other side of the door "Its not your fault...well it is a bit" he joked and I couldn't help but smile. " I needed you to know because if I didn't tell you before you married Slater then I would hate myself, I need to prove to myself I'm not a coward, I know your getting married and nothing can happen between use but you needed to know" he let out a long sigh.

I sat there for a while, thinking about what he said. I don't hate him because hating him for loving me didn't seem right. I unlocked my door "Jesse I want-" but he never found out what I wanted because he was gone.

**Jesse's POV**

She hates me. I know she does. I have be going over it in my head over and over. The look on her face when I told her, it said it all, she doesn't love me. Your a fool de Silva I told myself. I was so worked up and angry that I let out all of my pent up anger out on a brick wall. Regretting it instantly(brick walls are hard). I was heading for the beach when I remembered Paul, I had to fulfill my dubious honor of being his best man, I swear I could kill Paul Slater.

"Where the hell have you been?" was Paul's greeting as I slouched into his living room.

"There was something I had to take care of" was my feeble response.

"Well if you haven't noticed I'm getting married in 45 minutes" Paul looked like his head was going to fall off, not that I would have minded. "I had no idea" I muttered under my breath but Paul decided to become mute at that particular moment. Paul sighed "listen, I'm sorry I yelled I'm just a bit nervous" Paul Slater nervous, yeah right. "It's fine" I managed to mumble. Adam who had been silently watching this scene unfold, put an arm around me and the other around Paul, "Who's up for more beer?" he suggested. I know I'm going to be needing beer, lot's of it.

**Suze's POV**

"Suze, smile a little will ya?" the photographer pleaded as he snapped away with his camera "cheer up it's your wedding day". This guy is really getting on my nerves, I'm so tempted to sucker punch him right now. The whole half an hour of him taking pictures was a blur, I must have posed for at least a hundred photos.

The car had arrived and with a bit of a struggle I managed to get into the white stretch limo without, may I add ripping my dress. As we speed towards the beach the nerves hit me, I don't understand how I could be nervous. My breathing began to get harder and I felt pale. CeeCee the keen observer she is asked me if i was alright, "I...I..I need some air" I managed to stutter. The car slowed down and with some help from Gina I got out. I hadn't noticed what a hot day it was until now, I felt faint. CeeCee went to get me some water (from the nearest shop;of course), whilst Gina rubbed my back.

and without another word the world went black as I fainted in her arms.

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SO WHAT YA THINK??/

will Suze make it to the wedding??

Hit the little purple button and review to find out ( I want at least 4 to 5 reviews before I update)

LOVE Impulsive-Rose


	5. Chapter 5: That Dark Abyss

**Disclaimer: do I really gotta tell ya ? Once again for all those air heads out there I don't own anything to do with the mediator.. Just this story ... SORRY JESSE :(**

**Hey Guys sorry for not updating sooner I had a lot of school work to Finish but now I have THREE WHOLE WEEKS OF HOLIDAY'S **

**and you know what that means... MORE CHAPTERS !! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

**Okay I need to get a grip... but I'm so happy NO SCHOOL FOR 3 Weeks !! **-- **Sorry I'll Try and act like a normal human being. **

**Back to the story ... where were we?? Thats right poor Suze fainted and Jesse thinks Suze hates him :( What will happen next...**

#

** Second Thoughts: Chapter Five: That Dark Abyss  
**

**Jesse's POV**

Everyones seated and ready, except Paul who is pacing up and down the Isle, up and down, ITS MADDENING. I have to admit though, the set up was breath taking... especially the alter, -which looked out towards the waves- it was decorated with white and pink flowers. The Isle was made out of some sort of red velvet and we were surrounded by torches with flame - you know the kind that you stick in the ground- the overall effect was amazing.

I sighed and looked out towards the waves, they are so mesmerizing... like the waves had put a spell on me ... a trance... all my worries floated away with the breeze and I was free. Yeah right up until Paul -the life wrecker - brought me back to reality. "She's late, maybe she changed her mind, I knew it was all to good to be true".

I rolled my eyes, I mean is he serious? "Paul shes going to be here, get a grip."

"Yeah your right I was being silly, thanks mate, she'll be here soon". Yeah and didn't I know it.

X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X

_Half an hour later ..._

Okay so I was wrong, sue me. Half an hour later... still no Susannah. Okay I admit, I am pretty calm and you might even say happy. What? I'm allowed to be happy if I want to. I tried not to smile but I couldn't hold it in, especially when I saw Paul, I mean the guy was a mess. I admit I did a little more than just smile I burst out laughing and might I add, I got quiet a few stares. " What could possibly be so funny?" I sobered up real quickly and gave Paul and innocent shrug " It's just that your getting your self so worked up, you know how brides are... always late" well at least thats half true... I'm not sure Susannah would like being late to her own wedding. To my surprise Paul burst out laughing, which got him more stares then I did.

**Suze's Pov**

Darkness, nothing but a black, dim abyss.

"Suze, can you hear me Suze?" I opened my eyes, they strained to focus as I tried to concentrate on the voice. "Suze, it's me Gina and CeeCee's here". Yes it was Gina and CeeCee but wait whats happening? I looked around I was in a room, a room that was painted pink -might I add- with white laced curtains and I was surrounded by soft toys. "Where...where are we?"

"Suze you fainted, on the way to the wedding and Mrs O'Neil suggested to bring you to her house , uh.. this is her daughters room" CeeCee suplied.

Well that explains the pink but wait who's Mrs O'Neil ? "Who's Mrs O'Neil?".

"She was there when you fainted, shes a doctor, lucky she was passing" Gina piped up. Now it's clear, why couldn't they say so in the first place I mean- Wait a minute.. The wedding "The wedding, I've got to get to the wedding".

"Clam down Suze"

"NO I WON'T CALM DOWN, I need to get to that wedding"

**Jesse's POV**

To say things weren't going to plan would be an understatement. Susannah was only about an hour late. Hmmm ... poor Paul... Yeah right.

The guy has taken it pretty badly actually thats another understatement but I feel more sorry towards the poor bottles of beer hes been viciously attacking.

" Hey dude" I turned around, Adam is making his way towards me " Paul's pretty hammered".

"Lets hope he doesn't get alcohol poising" I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Hey Jesse, can I ask you something?"

"You just did" I said with a smile but noticed Adam's serious face "of course you can ask me anything".

"I was just wondering, how did you know that you loved her, Suze I mean". Um okay how am I going to answer this one?

"I... well-"

"Wait a minute" came a voice from behind, I turned around to find myself faced to face with Slater " Your in love with my girl?" damn, Paul heard every word. " Paul it's not-" but this time I wasn't interrupted. No, this time I trailed off as I noticed - to my undying horror- a white limo pull up. The door opened and -

#

**Thats were I'm ending it ! If you wanna find out what happens next hit that little purple button review, and TA DA you'll have a new chapter!! :) I promise the next update will come SOONER !!  
**

**Luv Nicole**


	6. MUSIC INTERVAL

**HEY GUYS !! sorry but i have been so busy that I haven't had time to right any more chapters but I'm getting on to it PROMISE so in the mean time this is a song I found that is perfect for Jesse's character !! ENJOY next chapter will be up SOON I SWEAR !! xoxox Luv Nicole :)**

**Ever fallen in love - by The Stiff Dylan's**

You stir up my natural emotions

Make me feel like dirt (I'm hurt)

And if I start a commotion

I run the risk of losing you

What is worse

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

I can't see much of future

Unless we find out who's to blame, what a shame

And we won't be together much longer

Unless we realize that we are the same

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

You stir up my natural emotions

And make me feel like dirt (I'm a mess)

And if I start a commotion

I only end up losing you

What is worse

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

Ever fallen in love with someone

Ever fallen in love, in love with someone

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with

Shouldn't have fallen in love with

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with


	7. Chapter 6: Speak Now or Hold Your Peace

**HELLO !!**

**I'm back and guess what I have?? A brand spanking new chapter YAY!! The wait is over !! :)**

**Disclaimer: if you have a brain you would already know I OWN NOTHING except the story plot SO THERE !!**

**By the way in my story Mom is Mum and Color is Colour because I live in AUSTRALIA and thats how you spell them down under (note I'm joking when I say down under; who says that??) and if any Americans or whoever has an issue with that take it up with my -invisible- lawyer !! so take that :) and I mean it in a non racist way of course :) only a joke :) calm down don't hurt me ... put the bat down ... ahhhhhhhhhhhh nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo**

**Chapter Six : Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace**

**Jesse's POV**

_"Wait a minute" came a voice from behind, I turned around to find myself faced to face with Slater " Your in love with my girl?" damn, Paul heard every word. " Paul it's not-" but this time I wasn't interrupted. No, this time I trailed off as I noticed - to my undying horror- a white limo pull up. The door opened and ..._

There stood I must admit two amazingly beautiful bridesmaids. CeeCee and Gina were wearing long floating emerald dresses that reminded me of of the calm, welcoming sea. I could have sworn when CeeCee stepped out of the limo Adam - who is standing next to me- gasped. I think I now know why he was only seconds ago asking me about love. Adam loves CeeCee. I gave Adam a sly smile that went unnoticed as he continued to stare shamelessly at his one true love.

**Suze's POV**

"Okay, you can do this Suze" Gina followed by CeeCee stepped out of the limo and it's my time to shine, all I need to do is remain positive. My mum came to the side of the door, she was going to escort me down the Isle. Andy who had been very enthusiastic to do so was politely rejected as I insisted my mum did it because it wouldn't seem right considering my dad's still hanging around. Yep you heard right, in fact if my eyes don't deceive me I can make out a distinctive glow at the end of the Isle. I reached out for my mothers hand as she helped me out of the limo.

I got a few appreciative gasps from the audience - god I make it sound like some sort of reality show- Mum handed me my lovely bunch of flowers (what the word that starts with B ?? you now a B something of flowers) and I linked arms with her. The wedding march drifted into the atmosphere, Gina and CeeCee made there way down the Isle.

**Jesse's POV**

Here they come, try and smile a little, I did, try that is mean. Adam nudged me and whispered " Jeez Jesse if your gonna make an effort try and look a little cheerful, you look like a sick dog".so apparently I wasn't trying hard enough, I dropped all efforts to look like this didn't bother me and tried to focus on something. Something like how Susannah looks even more beautiful at this moment then I have ever seen her, how the flickering flames lit up her flawless features, how madly, hopelessly, passionately in love with her I am.

As she reached the end of the Isle Paul took Susannah from her mum's arm and I watched as he lent over and pecked her on the cheek. This single act made my insides boil.

I tuned out as Father Dominic - yes the _Padre _is still with us- began the ceremony. My focus remained on Susannah. Once or twice she would look back at mean and I'm pretty sure this didn't go undetected by Paul.

When Father got up to the bit were he says: _If there is someone who has any reason to believe that these two shouldn't be bound in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace. _I could swear a dozen people looked in my direction; Adam, CeeCee, Gina, Paul, David, Suze's dead dad, Susannah and Father D included.

They all looked expectantly at me, Susannah's gaze intensively bored into me. I parted my lips and...

**Find out in the next chapter!! I love to keep you guys hanging!!**

**You know what to do if you ever want to see another chapter, it involves a little purple button ... **

**_I would like to make shout outs to the following people: my parents, my friends, My loyal readers which include : Kelsey,LuvEdwardC, MarienVolturi, twiihard13, xXSylviaXx,Literati Lover, rabid-squirell-3, Give up your Prejudices, Moonlight Silhouette, MarienVolturi, Emmzy _**

**_and to __jayd-n33,_ who I promised i would update today/ tomorrow well I kept m promise SO YOU CAN'T hurt me. Also if I have forgotten anyone let me know and I will give you a special shout out !! :)**

**Luv Nicole xxx**


	8. Chapter 7: Heart Retching Screams

**I'm standing and ready to deliver !! I promised it would be here on Friday and here it is !! the next chapter ! btw in Australia it's Friday the 4th of July today ! theres that whole issue with time difference and what ever BUT eh ! **

**Also If I haven't mentioned this in my story before, Susannah, Paul and Jesse are all mediators/ Shifters or wat eva! **

**Disclaimer: see my previous chapters ya bubble heads **

Chapter Seven: Heart Retching Screams

**Jesse's POV**

I parted my lips and... coughed. Don't worry though I covered my mouth. Once I was done coughing I looked up at Susannah, I got a glimpse of what I suspected to be disappointment- at least thats what I hoped it was as my heart gave a queer little flutter- before she turned away from me towards Paul.

Thats the story of my life! I remember the times we used to spend at the beach, this beach! Just Susannah and I, right up until Paul came along. Susannah has had many boyfriends, all of which I have disdained but none of them have I hated more then Slater. All of the others had come, flirted , tried to get in her pants and left but none of them had stirred up Susannah's and my friendship like Paul. There was a time where she wouldn't even speak to me! Oh well I guess a world with Susannah was better then a world without her, even if she did marry Paul. Because right up to literally the last second I was going to speak out and declare my love but at the last second I realized this, that I would rather her to be my friend , then to hate me forever. If it was meant to be with Paul, then it was meant to be.

I tactfully covered the fact that I was going to speak up by coughing.

The atmosphere was tense as the silence continued, only to be interrupted by Father Dominic as he went on with the ceremony. He, I noticed didn't have much enthusiasm in his speech performance and looked mighty disappointed but he continued.

I zoned out once again, normally I would find weddings to be romantically enchanting but this wedding was different. To me this wedding was a day in hell meets my very own funeral.

"And do you Susannah Simon take Paul to be you lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and health-"

More like hell, I thought to myself.

"till death do you part".

As if death would be an issue.

**Suze's POV **

"Till death do you part". I could have sworn I caught Jesse rolling his eyes at these words and I have a feeling I know what his thinking...

Father Dominic was looking at me, waiting for an answer... OH right...

"I... do"

**Jesse's POV**

"I... do". And thats the moment my whole life crumpled to heap of nothingness with a heart retching scream that nobody could hear.

**So there it is ! AND i know Susannah said I do BUT it ain't over yet so don't get disappointed and**** for all of you guys who wanted Jesse to speak up I'm sorry ! but I already know how its going to end and how i want it to happen BUT don't worry Jesse still has a chance !! ssshhhhhhhhh!! :)**

**As i normally say at the end of a chapter... if you wanna find out what happens next hit the purple button and review!! actually I don't really like purple, lets pretend its a green button.**

**So hit that green button and review if you wanna find out what happens next! and remeber from now on its a green button, if i hear about a purple button ...**

Luv Nicole xxx


	9. Chapter 8: Stunned

**I couldn't help but write another chapter... although it's short ... I can't say you Just have to read it!!**

**Disclaimer: look at my previous chapters **

Chapter Eight: Stunned

**Suze's POV**

As I said I do, I heard a strangled gasp and looked over at Jesse. He had turned white, whiter then any ghosts butts I have kicked back to their graves. Adam, whom was next to Jesse whispered something to him, I couldn't hear. Jesse nodded repeatedly and muttered that he was fine.

I couldn't help but be worried and kept glancing over at him every five seconds. What I didn't realize though was while I was glancing over at Jesse, Father Dominic was continuing on unaware of Jesse. Another thing that went unnoticed was Paul was watching every movement I made. Every time I looked at Jesse. What if something happened to Jesse? He didn't look to well. What if it was serious?

I suddenly felt sick to the stomach, my head started to spin and it finally dawned on me. Oh god I had mad the biggest mistake of my life. There was no turning back, I said I do. I was trapped like a mouse. I hadn't said I do like I meant it, I had said it as if it had kinda been forced out of me. I don't wanna spend the rest of my life being Susannah Slater. I shudder at the alliteration, okay its no better then Susannah Simon but its worse then Susannah De Silva.

Oh my god. I wanna be with Jesse. But it's to late, I have to grin it and bear it. I looked up at Paul. He looked down at me our eyes connected and... I looked away. They were so daunting, Paul's blue eyes, nothing but blue. I looked over at Jesse again and he gave me a grimace that I supposed resembled close to a smile. I looked into his rich brown eyes and by heart rate speed up. I have to stop this. I can't torture myself any longer.

Father Dominic turned to Paul " Do you Paul Slater take Susannah Simon to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health till death do you part".

Hear it comes, the start of my nightmare. The start of the rest of my heart broken life, bound to Paul. The man in question gently took hold of my hands and tried to catch my gaze. I tried not to grimace, I couldn't look into his eyes, so I took one fleeting look at Jesse and..

"I... can't do this". There we go know I'm bound to Paul forever... WAIT A MINUTE what did he say ?

"What did you say?" I looked up.

"I can't marry you" Paul whispered before exiting back up the isle leaving everyone stunned in there seats!!

**Okay so THERE!! I told ya Jesse still had a chance !! I have been planning this story for a while! so I knew What was going to happen!! I told you should trust me !**

**I think theres at least one or two more chapters worth in this story :) but after that :( no more story i'll be said I love this story !!**

**I don't wanna spoil the next chapter but now both Jesse and Paul have a chance Paul's still in this don't forget Suze might realize she does love him after all BUT so is Jesse WHO WILL WIN ...Find out when I can be bothered to write another chapter**

LOVE Nicole xxx


	10. Chapter 9: He Speaks

**SOz about the wait Its my second week back at school and the teachers have the crazy Idea that we actually like home work and have given us SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Much i'm considering suicide(dont take me seriously but i am suffering from an attack of homeworkittiis) TO MUCH HOME WORK ISN"T GOOD FOR MEEEEEEEEEEE**

**Chapter Nine: He Speaks**

**Suze's POV**

I found him exactly were I thought I would. Beyond the cove near the point. The deserted strip of beach we discovered on our first dates. We had stayed up all night arm in arm watching the effect the moon gave the shimmering waves. Paul sitting with his back leaning against a rock watching the mystic waves toss and churn.

I approached him and with out a word I sat beside him and following suit lent my back on the rock. The whole wedding fiasco happened hours ago and I had managed to get away from the frantic guests, change and make my way here, I hadn't spoken to Jesse at all, nor could I look at him. At least I couldn't until everything was sorted.

We sat in silence for ages, Paul never acknowledged my presence nor did he dismiss me. The silence wasn't awkward or forbidding in fact it was one of those comfortable serene silences.

I was a bit startled when Paul turned and faced me, it was the first time he had moved.

"I couldn't do it," the words were barely audible but I didn't have to strain my ears to hear them " I couldn't do it ... it wasn't fair... to you or to me" Paul closed his eyes as he spoke.

"Your right Paul... I'm sorry... I didn't mean for this to happen... I didn't want it to be this way" my voice trembled as I was on the verge of tears.

"I love you Suze but I don't think its the same way Jesse loves you" he reached out and gently brushed away my tears "It's meant to be this way".

Neither of us spoke after that. I snuggled down beside him and we held each other through the night.

We were just comforting each other before you get the wrong idea. It was nice. When I did get up to leave I gave him a brief goodbye peck on the lips and left.

It was 2am before I reached home. When I did I went straight to bed. I couldn't sleep though my thoughts were on Jesse I hadn't seen him since Paul ditched me at the alter.

But just as my thoughts about Jesse were going a stray there was a "Tap Tap Tap" at my window. I flung of the bed covers and strode across the room, wrenched open the window, stuck my head out and looked down.

**I thought that chappie was kinda cute :) but it doesn't really matter what I think its your thoughts i want! so review !! **

**ALSO i'm runnig a poll on who you think should be throwing rocks at Suzes window, Jesse or Paul! so vote but don't forget to review!!**

**LUV Nicole xxx**


	11. Chapter 10: Our Forever

**HEY EVERY ONE !! I AM SO SORRY I HAVE BEEN MEGA BUSY SO I HAVE ONLY HAD THE CHANCE TO WRITE THIS NOW !!**

**OMG guess what ?? This is the grand final !! last chapter ever!! trust me when I started writing this chapter i had no idea it was going to end but it just wrote it self it was like i had no input in the matter !! any who just read it !!**

**Chapter Ten: Our forever**

**Suze's POV**

_But just as my thoughts about Jesse were going a stray there was a "Tap Tap Tap" at my window. I flung of the bed covers and strode across the room, wrenched open the window, stuck my head out and looked down._

"Jesse, what are you doing here?" I hissed down at the dark figure. I had to admit he looked more beautiful then I remembered. The dim street lights enhanced his already stunningly flawless features.

"I had to see you, I had to be near you" He said in a angelically sweet voice, a voice that was so pure that with every word he spoke my insides melted and I couldn't think straight. I had a strong urge to fling myself out the window into his arms but a few seconds after the idea crossed my thoughts I realized that wasn't the best of ideas.

"I'll be right down". I said shortly and flung the first jumper I could find over my tattered old PJ's. Before I made my descent down the stairs I made a pit stop at the bathroom. The face staring back at me wasn't the same worn face that stared back at me only hours before. I hadn't realized it then but I saw it now, the change in my once emotionless eyes was clear, they were lit with burning excitement, my checks glowing like a shinning beacon of hope and... my hair was a tangled mess. A smile tugged at the corner of my lips as I ran a brush through my hair. Once It was perfect I hurried out of there.

I almost ran down the stairs and had to steady myself at the bottom. I flung myself at the door and wrenched it open. He was as stunning as ever. My breath got caught in my throat at the sight of him standing strong and true, he was a god.

We stood like that for a while, I admit it was a little awkward, I hadn't thought this part through. Am I meant to fling myself at him (like I was so desperate to) or should I invite him graciously into the apartment. He seemed to take in my confusion and a beautiful smile spread across his lips. "Querida" The word sounded so delicious coming from his soft, inviting lips. He made his was towards me and my heart was pounding underneath the material of my jumper, it was so loud I was sure he could hear it.

He was standing right in front of me, so close that I could feel his body heat radiating of him. I looked up, up into those smoldering chocolate brown eyes and I was lost, my thoughts, my worries were washed away. Thats when it happened he reached out with one of his perfect, sturdy hands and gently caressed my check. Thats the moment my whole body exploded and before I knew what I was doing, before I could think my hands snaked around the back of his neck and his arms wrapped around my waste. I could see every contour of his face, every detail perfectly carved. My eyes closed on there own accord and my lips drew nearer to his.

The feeling was so intense and passionate that I couldn't stand it but nor could I stop. At this moment I knew that this was my future, there was no trace of doubt in my mind. It didn't matter if we were married or not, he had my heart and I had his. He is the air that keeps my heart beating. We fit perfectly together, if it wasn't for Jesse I needn't exist.

From this moment we can look forwards to our future for the rest of eternity, in this life and the next. This is our forever.

**OMG THATS IT !! i cant believe its over :( but it kinda a good thing cause i wanted to make this story simple and didnt want to drag it on... i think its a good ending... but i want you to tell me ... i want all the feed back i can get ! OMG THIS IS SO SAD!! ITS OVER WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA**

**:'( **

**I LOVE YOU ALL this isn't the end of me there are still storys waiting to pop out of my head so keep a look out for them !  
**

**LOVE YOU LOVE Nicole xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo :) **


	12. After Thought

Just and after thought I was reading over my story and i realised how much they drink in it! its like every second theres a drink in there hands LOL

gawd soz bout that but i just realized that LOL any who u guys should read my new story entitled : **Never Letting Go **

tell me what u think of it :) in fact i'm going to post the first chapter here and tell me if u like it :)

**Never Letting Go **

**Chapter one: Stale Blood **

I hate hospitals. The stale smell of blood hanging in the air as the fluorescent lights flickered every half a second. The colourful paintings on the white wash walls failed to make the bleak room blithe. The only furniture in the room was an occupied bed with a plastic chair to its left. The open window to the right of the bed gave you a breathtaking view of the car park. Yep the car park because everyone just loves looking at parked cars. This irrelevant fact only held my attention for a split second as I turned my attention to the bed. Not that I had a specific fascination with beds or anything.

No, it was _who_ occupied the bed that made my heart clench as I received a blow of pain to my insides. Not physical pain but emotional pain. I gasped. It couldn't be him but there was no mistaking the scar above his dark brow. The natural olive twinge to his skin that I loved was pale white. As I stepped closer I noticed dark bruises under the thick lashes of his closed eyes. He lay there so still, so lifeless, if it wasn't for the small rise and fall of his chest I could have sworn he was dead. I couldn't look at the drip in his hand. My breathing became ragged as I took in the scene before me. I slumped down into the chair beside the bed and took his hand in mine ( The one without the drip) and lightly caressed it to my face. My vision became obscured as the tears fell freely down my face and lightly onto my swollen belly. The truth hit me hard. If Jesse wasn't dead yet it was only a matter of time.

**I know its short but i also have a second chapter up which is WAY LONGER :)**


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